Manners matter. No where else in the world will you find this to be more true than in the south. Manners, etiquette, deportment, couth, it's known by many names, and if you want be a southern belle or gentleman, you best start learning the finer details.
Most etiquette books will teach you how to set a table or the proper way to engrave a wedding invitation, but what many lack is the "southern way" of doing things. For example, just recently I've had several friends and business acquaintances announce their impending nuptials. When a southern couple becomes engaged you can bet your last dollar, the bride-to-be chased her man until he caught her. But to "congratulate" her on the engagement, as if she had "won" her man is improper, if not insulting and rude. Never congratulate the bride-to-be.
We are to assume the gentleman chased her, caught her, and persuaded her to become his bride. He is to be congratulated for winning the heart of his lovely bride-to-be. And his family may be congratulated, as well.
"Best Wishes" is the proper response to the bride-to-be and to her family upon learning of the engagement.
Many folks remain true to the "Best Wishes" response for the bride even after the wedding ceremony. Where others will contend that the rule changes, and it is proper to congratulate the wedded couple. The logic behind the change is there is no longer the implication of the bride "catching" the groom as there is with the announced engagement.
Using "Congratulations" when "Best Wishes" is appropriate is not a terrible faux pas. But it is a subtle distinction that will not go unnoticed by the true southerners within earshot.
Today is Boxing Day in the UK, and even though I've never celebrated it in the past, it feels like Boxing Day at my house because I'm boxing up all the food and other goodies and remaining gifts to take to my parents house in Franklin where we'll meet up with our west Tennessee family to continue our Christmas celebration.
Boxing Day is also St. Stephen's Day, as in the carol about Good King Wenceslas.
Some say Boxing Day is the day to give gifts to your servants. Others say it is a time to give gifts to the poor. It is also a day for spending with your family and friends. And it is a tradition I may just start this year.
Besides cooking for our traditional family Christmas Eve dinner which will be at my brother's house this year and preparing a brunch casserole for tomorrow, I'm looking forward to delivering packages to my neighbors of baked goodies my friends Dawn, Amber, Carson and I made yesterday.
Dawn and her kids have a Christmas tradition of baking every year, and this year they let me join them. What a blast!!
We made Ginger Cookies, Russian Teacakes, Chocolate Biscotti, and Sugar Cookies with Amaretto Vanilla Butter Cream Icing. Although Dawn slowed down to make us a delicious lunch, we still snacked on Carson's homemade Chex Party Mix and their secret family recipe of Pecan Toffee Bark. DE-LISH!!!
Ginger Cookies
1 1/2 stick butter
1 cup sugar
1/4 cup molasses
1 egg
2 cup flour
2 tsp ginger
2 tsp soda
2 tsp cinnamon
Cream sugar, butter, egg, and molasses. Add dry ingredients. Chill overnight. Roll into small balls and roll in granulated sugar.
Bake on greased cookie sheet at 350* for about 10 minutes. Makes 100 cookies.
I loved that we baked these first. The aroma filled the whole house and mixed with the pine scent from their Christmas tree, the Jones house smelled like Christmas.
The next item to make is a tradition for Dawn and her family, and may be a tradition for me from now on. We baked Russian Teacakes. They are coveted!
Russan Teacakes
1 cup butter
1/2 cup confectioner's sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla
2 1/4 cup all purpose flour (Dawn insists on King Arthur Flour)
1/4 teaspoon salt
3/4 cup finely chopped nuts
Pre-heat oven to 400*. Mix butter, sugar, and vanilla. Work in flour, salt and nuts until the dough holds together. Roll in 1- inch balls. Place on ungreased cookie sheet.
Bake 10-12 minutes until set, but not brown.
While warm, roll into confectioner's sugar. Cool. And then roll a second time in powdered sugar.
Chocolate Biscotti
1 stick butter
1 1/4 cup sugar
2 eggs
1 teaspoon almond extract
2 1/2 cups flour
1/4 cup cocoa
1 1/2 teaspoon vanilla
1 1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
2 cups chopped almonds
Preheat oven to 350*
Beat butter and sugar until well blended. Add eggs, almond and vanilla extracts and beat well.
Sift together flour, cocoa, baking powder and salt. Gradually add butter mixture, beating till smooth. (Dough will be very thick.)
Stir in nuts.
Shape dough into 2 inch long rolls. Place rolls 3-4 inches apart on large ungreased cookie sheet.
Bake for 30 minutes. Cool. Cut rolls diagonally in 1/2 inch slices. Arrange slices cut side down and bake 8-9 minutes. Turn slices over and back 8-9 minutes.
Cool on wire rack.
Optional: Dip one end in melted chocolate.
We also spent much of the day baking and decorating sugar cookies.
We had an assortment of sprinkles, pearls, coconut flakes, and Amber mixed up several colors of icing for us to use in piping bags. This was my first experience using piping bags, and it was so much fun.
I had just learned a trick to putting the icing in the bag and was happy to contribute useful information to these folks who were experienced cooks. Below is the Youtube tutorial I found on Pinterest.
Amaretto Vanilla Butter Cream Icing
2 sticks butter
4 cups powdered sugar
pinch salt
2 tsp vanilla
2 tsp almond extract
2-3 TBSP milk
Soften butter and cream with sugar. Add salt, vanilla, and almond extract. Add milk to create the consistency you want...thicker for piping or thinner for spreading.
Yesterday afternoon I had the priviledge to volunteer for the Maury County Sheriff's Citizen's Academy "Shop with a Cop" event. Fundraisers throughout the year fund this special program that allows teachers at Maury County schools to select one child who will shop for Christmas presents with their school's residing deputy.
Friday, December 16, was the last half-day of school for Maury County before Christmas break. The officers, the kids and their teachers were treated to a movie at Shadybrook 12, The Muppets, and all the popcorn and soft drinks they wanted. Then came the trip to Wal-mart. Each child was allotted $150 for their shopping spree.
And then the merry party migrated to Riverside Elementary for a pizza party with Santa, and had their packages wrapped for Christmas morning.
I was paired with a young man named Jameson who was a delight. Taylor, the head cheerleader at Spring Hill High School, Melena Keeling and I pushed a buggy among a sea of elementary-aged youngsters, hyped on sugary soft drinks and Christmas anticipation, working with Jameson to select not only Christmas presents for himself, but items for his brother, sister, mother, and cousins.
The event was well-planned, -funded, and -organized. Still with hundreds of people descending on Wal-mart with a mission, it was hard to get around to everyone to wish them a Merry Christmas. I did see in the group Sheriff Enoch George, Chief Deputy Nathan Johns, and Deputy Mike Barnes. Of the volunteers, I recognized Eric and Lisa Previti.
What amazes me every year is that these children come with the attitude of buying for other people when they could spend the entire allotment on themselves. I don't know why I'm amazed. Deep in my soul I know that our Heavenly Father gave his son so we may have hope. Jesus Christ gave his life so that we may have Life. What else can we do at Christmastime but give?
Thank you to everyone who participated in this year's event. A special Thank you to the deputies and employees of the Maury County Sheriff's office, a special Thank you to Wal-mart and their very patient sales associates who were very helpful and efficient, and a special Thank you to the Sheriff's Citizen Academy alumni and volunteers.
Unlike hat etiquette for men, ladies have very few rules.
Ladies hats are a fashion accessory, much like a belt or jewelry. So, unlike men who remove their hats when coming indoors, women never do.
A woman would never "doff" her hat.
If your day's plans include being outdoors, a large-brimmed hat is acceptable.
However, if your day's activities are indoors, a small hat is a better choice.
My Momma, Ms Bette, advised me that a hat is not to be worn after 5pm. She must subscribe to the Emily Post philosophy. According to Emily Post a lady is NOT to wear hats with evening wear, but has she never heard of the "cocktail hat?" I think this rule is more of style issue, and not one based on etiquette.
Hats are mandatory for High Tea.
Many corporations have dress codes that will not permit hats in the workplace. Even Doris Day in "Lover Come Back" removed her hat once she arrived to her Park Avenue office.
The rules for women change, however, if they wear a hat that was intended to be worn by a man... baseball cap, cowboy hat, fedora. She would be expected to remove her hat when at home, at work, at mealtimes and at restaurants or cafes, at a theater, when the national anthem is played, when the national flag passes and at religious services.
With a ladies' style hat, a woman does not remove it during the national anthem.
However for women in the military, they must follow the exact same rules as the men for their "covers."
God has lovingly and generously showered his sweet blessings all around middle Tennessee. I enjoy so much selecting one each day to share with you in these pictures, recipes, inspirations and sometimes, completely random thoughts. Thank you for the visit. Come on back again real soon!
"To see the miraculous within the ordinary is the mark of highest wisdom." ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
"I like to see a man proud of the place in which he lives. I like to see a man live so that his place will be proud of him." ~Abraham Lincoln
